Today I went bicycle riding... first time in about a year, first time since my latest bout with dizziness... (Dizziness... did I ever elaborate on that... It isn't dizzy like everything is going around in circles, like you see on television...it is like everything is jumping...unless I keep my head perfectly still.) Now let me add that I have done some serious bicycle riding in my late 20's and mid 30's and early 40's. I don't mean like a few blocks, I mean like 60 mile a day...camping at night, then riding again the same the next day. It was fun, and I was good... Of course as I got older it was less intense, but... bottom line, I am no stranger to bicycle riding...) Well it was pretty wild.
I remember when I was in Germany with my cousin, and we would find a few bicycles (Once we mistakenly took one of my Uncles workers bikes by accident) and so my Grandmother (Oma) decided to ride with us... now mind you she was in her late 70's, early 80's. and we were amazed because she was winding and all over the road. The reason I tell that story is because that is how I was today. Curbs, telephone poles, the point where the sidewalk hits the grass... all of those things became obstacles for me... and do you think I hit the brakes... Nope, I did stop pedaling... but I think I was my Oma for a few minutes there. The only difference is I wasn't telling my husband to watch where he was going...
I mentioned that my husband had a stroke, well up until not to long ago, (within a year) he would talk about things not feeling real around him... I couldn't understand that. But now I do... Thinking back on our little jaunt on the bicycle... it doesn't seem like it really happened... I know it happened, and I know where it happened, and I know that I went along with it, wanted to do it... put air in the tires, made sure the helmet was on correctly, and tight, but I think my vision, the way things look to me have an affect on my perception of things.
For the past 4 months I have been trying to do things around the house... Mostly the only thing I am successful at is making the bed and cleaning out the litter box. Well, unloading the dishwasher and putting things away, I miss the counter, hit the trim on the cabinets, bang my head a lot, can't seem to get a feel for where things are around me.... Possibly because I walk around squinting or with one eye closed in order to see things clearly. But nothing has been like this bicycle ride. This was Mr. Toads Wild Ride for sure.
But I am sure that it will have no bearing on anything. After all, I don't ride my bicycle to work, or for work, I sit at a desk and type orders, and answer the phone. No reason why I shouldn't be able to do that...
What, what is that you say... the other stuff that a person does in life... Hmmpf... don't look for society to worry about that... that is your problem. But when things get out of control, and you can't do the maintenance on your home, and care for your Mother, or care for your family...well then we will put you on Dr. Phil or reality TV, and see if they can help you... and someone will rake in the bucks from the sponsors, and you will be the talk around the water cooler and at the lunch table... What more do you want out of life...?
Mr. Toads Wild Ride...yup.... Mr. Toads Wild Ride....
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