Tell me why it is some days are a breeze to get through, and others are torture.... I mean sheer torture from the time you open your eyes, till you close them again. I know this sounds wrong, but it seems on those days the only way I can be is miserable. I want to be carefree, and I want to be "happy" in the sense of my mood, since as an over all rule, I am happy with my life, it's just that certain day are just a chore.....

Well, yesterday and today are like that. I look forward to lunch, not just because it is an hour off, but because it is an hour off that signifies that half of my day is over.

And, I hate the fact that I am wishing my life away, because, I love my life, as an over all rule.

But if you really break this down, that could be just the problem. I love "my" life. I am fed up with my employers life. And... I resent the fact that I am dependent on my employers life, in order to have "my" life.

Does that mean my job is not satisfying..... You Betchya! But I consider myself lucky to have my job. And... I am fearful of losing my job in todays market. I am getting to that age where finding another job to replace this one will be extremely difficult. Yet, I am still young enough that I have a good 15 years before I could even toy with the ideas of retiring.

Maybe this is a mid life crisis... Hmmm, need to Google "Mid Life Crisis"

But, again, I don't suffer from the MLC on the weekends, or while I am on vacation....

I guess the final diagnosis is... I am bored with my job, but feel prisoner to it. So what do I do....

Well I ain't going back to school. I am not going to look for a new one....So I might as well just wait till this passes. What is that they say...."This too shall pass..." Hope it does! Cause I sure don't want to walk around like this much longer.....