I am also on the wait and see approach, and that is fine with me.
My problem isn't with myself. I am fine with what ever happens to me, as long as I know I did what ever I could, when I could.
I have said what my wishes are... but that doesn't mean that I am willing to let things happens as they may. I guess I am too much of a fighter to allow just what ever to go down. I want to make the best of my life right now. At my age, and my situation, it isn't like I am going to start planning for my retirement 30 or 40 years down the road.
My Father had 3 strokes, my Husband had a stroke. So in essence they are and were brain injured. However that is not recognized. They not only act or acted different, they think different, they comprehend different. They are not the same as they were. But they are and were treated the same, and the expectations of them are and were the same.
I was asked to join a support group for caretakers of stroke victims while my Dad was in the hospital the last time... because he would only do things for me. Unbeknown to me, that was marked in his chart in the hospital. I think that is because I fought for him every single step of the way. I didn't treat him like an invalid, but I took his disabilities into consideration when I saw how people treated him. Those people had a large affect on the way he responded to their care. But you know what, it really didn't make a difference in the long run, because I had to go back to Florida to work, 500 miles away in a week. So after I left, what I did for him in the hospital was not done anymore, and he fell by the wayside.
For my husband I was with him every day, and night when I could. I fought for him, despite what others around me wanted me to do. I made it clear I wasn't going anywhere.
We need to be more sensitive to people in general. Think more of what they are dealing with in life, and maybe think about what their life is like, instead of expecting it to be what it isn't.
That is my problem with Angioma's and people with Angiomas. Heck I have a problem that the term isn't even recognized. These are real problems, and with that comes real problems that need to be addressed.
I am grateful for my friends that I have on the internet. I just wish that everyone with brain injury had the compassion and understanding of the community. Unfortunately, unless we where a sign that says something to that effect, most people just don't want to take the time to have patience, or have any sense of understanding what other around them are going through. However even then I don't think it would make a difference, because the truth is people just don't have the compassion for their fellow human being that they should.
I wish I could change the world, just a little...
1 comment:
How did others treat your father when he was in the hospital? Did they treat him like he was lesser than a 'normal' human being?
You're right, your father probably own did things for you since you were the one who CARED - whether that is in being a caretaker or treating him with respect and understanding his new limitations.
I hope with more time, more awareness can be made so stroke victims are not all lumped together.
After my stroke (brainstem hemorrhage) people talked to me slower and acted like I was mentally incapacitated. I explained over and over again that the bleed was in my stem, I thought clearly still, blood was blocking the signals to my body - that's all. But everyone still treated me as if I was stupid. Everytime I had a 'brain fart' they wouldn't say anything - I knew what they were thinking 'tsk tsk, brain injury...'
I'm really sorry that so many people close to you have had strokes. With every person we touch, hopefully we can create more understanding and awareness of what brain injuries really are. They happen to everyone, they do not discriminate. It's still one of those things that happen to 'other' people.
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