Ok, it is two days after election day...

.. and I have to admit... I am pretty bummed out...We here in Florida in IMHO got a bum deal... 

I really want to get out of this state, because this has been the tide for a long time.  I used to be involved in politics, and I just invested too much of myself into it. 

I guess I could get involved with Angioma Alliance, and work towards that, but currently, my head is all caught up in my job.

I went to the movies today with Mom.  Just Mom and I which is hard enough, because she walks very slow, and I am very anxious when ever I go out by myself, because I really can't see, and Mom can't really see.. so we make a great pair.

Besides... I find myself feeling guilty because there supposedly is a job for me to go back to... and I look normal... or I think I do.  I can't work as fast as I would like to...and that is no where fast enough for the company I work for.  So... I have 3 choices. 1)  I can continue to feel guilty about taking my Mom out to the movies, and looking normal, but not being normal, while I am on disability. 2)  I can stay home and not go out because I am on disability, and I will feel guilty.   3)  I can attempt to return to work, not work at the productivity level they require me to, get fired, and still not be able to work.  Possibly collect un-employment for a short period of time, all in all that would destroy our family... Truly destroy it.

As I said two days ago, I am going for a driving evaluation on Tuesday... $250.00, paying that myself, since Insurance won't cover it and I am not sure what will happen next.  My authorized time off from work is up to 11-19-10, and I am not allowed to return without a clearance from my neurosurgeon, which I can't get till I see him and my appointment is 1 month later.  So that means, I can not return to work, my date of return from my neurosurgeon is 1-3-11.  So... they could in all rights, since this is a right to work state, or a free will to work state, what ever it is called, it is a screw the employee state, and it is getting worse, and 11-2-10 proved that...

So aside from my guilt, and my worries this is not a good time for me.  Not at all...

Oh well...